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horney womanI am a tattooist, artist, dj, and graphic designer. (Art geek.) I spent my 20's and early 30's partying my ass off, so I don't think I'll have a mid life crisis or anything like that. (My whole life is a daily crisis. ) I've done it all. (...and then some!) Right now I am focusing on my art. (Quit my job.) Working for other people is crazy!(justification for quiting.) Why trade time for dollars at something you either don't like, or aren't very good at? (Or both!) I'm never going to achieve the level of success I dream of, spending 40 hours a week working outside of my chosen proffession. (Siting on my ass, the rest of the time, doesn't help.) So things may be a little financially tight for a while. (You're buying. ) If that's a problem, then go click on someone else. (Surprized you read this far anyway.) But if you aren't superficial (A souless Money Nazi.) Then by all means....please continue. (It gets worse. )Be yourself. That's it! (Well who the Hell else would you be?) Be honest with yourself, and honest with me. The truth may sometimes hurt, but it will always set you free. (That's what mommy told me after Mr. Kitty "ran away".) Don't pretend things are different than how they really are. (Like I was your first choice, for instance.) If it's just a booty call...fine. Be upfront about it. (Plenty of booty to go around.) If you are looking for Mr. Right and the whole "Princess" package.......you should have clicked "back" a long time ago. Naive little princesses usually grow up to become Money Nazi's. [Gold digger implies that work was involved.) Money Nazi's want more than what they got, and what they got is never enough! For example.....Hitler wasn't content with controlling all of Europe and Northern Africa. Nope, he had to go bomb Britian and attack Russia too! So basically; I guess what I am trying to say is that ....Hitler was a whore? (I had nothing.)And that is why I don't date women with mustaches! (Finished even worse. ) ---God.....I am such a dork. Which brings me to my next qualification...sense of humor. (You are going to need one!) You had better be funny. (Because clearly I am not. ) I don't mean laughs a lot, I mean you better be the one crackin' jokes. (I just made a Hitler joke on an Adult website.) Personality goes a long way. (Far enough for two, I hope.) I am one of those weird people that needs to respect a person on a mental level, before I can feel anything more than physical attraction. (When I say a woman I 'respect,' I really mean anyone who will put up with my bullsh1t.) I know....I'm like a chic that way!!! (How the Hell would I know?) But at least I'm up front about it. (It's hard to miss.) Simple minds talk about people, average minds talk about events, and great minds talk about ideas. (Read that on a box of herbal tea when my ex said she wanted to get tea-bagged. ) What? ---I make a mean cup of tea. |
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First Time Swinging Watching him screw my wife was fantastic ! We did it ! We have officially become swingers. And it feels bloody great ! Last night we went to a smart hotel where we met a nice young man of 26 who had contacted us via AFF. After a few drinks we took him back to our luxury suite where Susie allowed, no begged, this stranger to put first his tongue and then his cock in her pussy and her ass. It was amazing to watch Susie with her lovely stocking clad legs wrapped around his back whilst he fucked her good and hard. I got in on the action too as together we made Susie’s wish for double penetration come true. There was a moment, earlier in the week, when I thought it wouldn’t happen. Susie was having second thoughts. Reading what other people have written in this section of the magazine it was clear that this is very common. Susie decided to confide in a very close friend who she knew had herself had a MFF threesome. Her friend was green with envy and said ‘Go for it girl! And she did. By the time we met our new friend Susie was very calm and clearly enjoying the moment. We all had a couple of drinks to overcome the nerves and got to know each other better. Now I know that some people advise that in this situation you should take it slowly, maybe meet each other a few times, but believe me we all knew what we wanted and having checked out that we were all up for it we set off to get it. --------------------------- First Time Swing Party My wife, Judy, and I have been married for over 20 years, and have enjoyed good sex several times a week. Recently I read an article in a magazine about a couple who had just been to their first swing party, and got an erection reading about their experience. I shared it with Judy and she got wet just reading it also. We then went to an adult store and bought a magazine for swingers and tracked down some phone numbers and started making calls. We finally decided on one which seemed to be very discreet and only accepted couples. They also had a couple hundred members so there would be plenty of opportunity to watch and/or participate. We planned a Saturday night, took our little overnight bag filled with all our necessary articles, just in case we might decide to have sex with each other, though we had both pretty much agreed that we would only watch, the first time we went. We got there about 10 and went thru the signup, were briefed on the house rules, and given a tour of the place. Another couple joined at the same time and they seemed as nervous as we were about it all. After the tour we went to the bar and dance area and had a drink (it was BYOB) and sat to observe the dancing. ----------------------------------- How We Started Swinging I hope this doesn't get too long for you, but let me give you some history of us. Even before we got married I knew I could never fully satisfy her sexually. I could eat her to satisfaction, but as soon as I tried to fuck her I cum within 2 or 3 strokes. Sometimes even before getting it in her. We had been living together for about three months when one night while I was at work she got drunk and let one of the guys we work with, and had a reputation of using women for his pleasure, fuck the shit out of her. She said she was sorry and I could really satisfy her with my tongue, but she likes a really good fuck too. She said she would understand if I made her move out. I asked her to marry me instead. Then when I first started to talk about a threesome she was very reluctant to even talk about it. Well it finally came out that she thought that this was just a way for me to get even and other women. So I told her I had no intentions of fucking other women, that I just wanted her to have all the sexual pleasure she desired. So with that said we set some rules to play by. How silly of me to think they would last. 1. This was for her sexual pleasures and her desires. 2. I was not to have any sexual relation with any other woman than her. 3. No kissing that was intimate and was to be reserved for us. 4. Condoms would be used for penetration because I felt that should be reserved for us. -------------------------------- Phone Sex Swinging My fianc? and I have fantasized for a couple of years about swapping, group sex, just random, physical sex. She went from saying it was nothing she was interested in to agreeing to do soft swap, having sex with me while in a room watching another couple, to actually joining in with another woman for a threesome with me about a year ago. I’ve been constantly telling her how much I’d like to see her fuck another man and she agreed to full swap as soon as there was an opportunity. She travels out of state for long periods, sometimes several weeks at a time. We have mutual phone sex on a regular basis to keep our sex life somewhat taken care of but on several occasions I’ve asked her to fantasize and tell me what she’d do if she were with another man at that very moment. Well, this went on for months until one night I asked her if she’d do something for me I really wanted. She told me, of course she would, if she could. I asked her to find a stranger, someone she was attracted to and fuck him, later telling me all about it. She went a step further and said, “how about if I bring him to the house she was staying at and fuck him with the phone nearby so I could listen. I begged her to no tease me. She promised me she was not. She can get off 5 -6 times in a row and loves sex as much as a man. She also is a cum freak. She likes to feel a man cum deep in her pussy. She also is turned on by a certain look; shaved head with a goatee or big mustache. She has called me on several occasions after having flirted openly with guys who fit her style. I always asked why she didn’t take him home and blow his mind. She said the situation was never right.